Most of us are familiar with that negative voice in our head: The one that tells us we aren’t good enough, that we should stop trying, that we aren’t worthy. But just because that voice exists doesn’t mean we are stuck with it, and there are a number of ways to stop negative talk in your head that are surprisingly effective. Self-confidence, positivity, and mental clarity can be cultivated — even if it’s difficult — and utilizing these tricks can help ensure that we don’t actually listen to that pesky person inside our head telling us we can’t accomplish what we want.
“It’s important to get the negative voice out of your head because, if it’s strong enough, it has the power to [overcome you] — your meeting, your day, your relationships, your life,” psychologist Deborah E. Dyer, Ph.D.tells Bustle. “Most of us are our own worst critics. Shutting down the negative voice allows your confidence, self-esteem, and energy to flow and to be powerful, not powerless.”
We can’t always make that pessimistic voice disappear completely, but we can overcome it and not allow us to drive our actions. Here are seven effective hacks for getting that negative voice out of your head, according to experts.
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Jada Pinkett Smith & Willow Talked About Her Self Harming Herself After Willow’s Hit Song …
Jada Pinkett Smith — who was accompanied by her mother Adrienne Banfield-Jones — revealed she and Willow, 17, had “talked” about the moment after the teenager admitted on Red Table Talk she had been self-harming after achieving success with her 2010 single “Whip My Hair.”
“I wanted to make sure she was okay,” Jada Pinkett Smith said. “We went through what happened and in the moment I realized as a mother you also have to give your children space to deal with their own shadow.”
The Girls Trip star said she chose to pay attention to the positive things that came from Willow’s revelation.
“I focused more on how she got herself out versus what got her there,” she said. “I was most proud about that she could share it in the way she did, which let me know she had come through in a major way that she could put it on the table like that.”
“I wanted to focus on what [it was] that got her through,” the actress explained. “I really talked to her about her powering side of her journey and give her all the praise in the world for that part instead of focusing on, ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’”
Fall Date Night Ideas
Beautiful leaves are falling and the air is beginning to chill, making Fall the perfect season to plan date nights in with your Honey. Between work and family, so much time is dedicated to things that are not centered around our spouse. Here are some ideas that will keep you cozy and connected to the one you love.
An Intimate Picnic for Two
There is always something romantic about a picnic, and having one indoors allows you both to get comfortable. Soft pillows, candles, and music, along with some of your favorite foods, creates the perfect setting for an intimate dinner in.
Go back to the basics…skip reserving tickets at a crowded theater and share the couch with your favorite person. Binge watch a series or enjoy something ‘chilling’ that will keep you two in each others arms.
Start your evening on the kitchen counter. Find an exotic recipe or create a dish of your own; either way, preparing a meal together is a great way to add some spice to your night.
Cocktails and Conversation
Sip on something sweet while conversing with your sweetheart. Take time to “wine” down after a long week and talk about all the things that are good with you and that special someone.
Engage In Friendly Competition
Doing something fun together can be a healthy way to release some stress and tension in your relationship. Play games that you both enjoy and keep the experience positive and supportive. Remember, either win or lose, you both are on the same team.
Share a Dance
Pull out your playlist and pull your love close to you. Dance to the songs that have become yours, and reminisce of when your love was new.
Colin Kaepernick gets Harvard black culture award
CAMBRIDGE, Mass. (AP/KSAZ) – Former NFL quarterback Colin Kaepernick and comedian Dave Chappelle were among eight people who were saluted by Harvard University for their contributions to black history and culture.
The eight recipients of the W.E.B. Du Bois Medal were honored Thursday afternoon by the Hutchins Center for African and African American Research at Harvard.
Thank you Harvard University for honoring me tonight with the W.E.B. Du Bois Medal. I’m grateful for this recognition and to be amongst the other highly esteemed honorees that inspire me.
Photo Credit: Amari Kenoly @foot_candles pic.twitter.com/plXOBuwBlF
— Colin Kaepernick (@Kaepernick7) October 12, 2018
Kaepernick, formerly of the San Francisco 49ers, created a firestorm when he began kneeling during the national anthem in 2016 to protest police brutality and social injustice.
The other honorees are Kenneth Chenault, chairman and a managing director of General Catalyst; Shirley Ann Jackson, president of Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute; Pamela Joyner, founder of Avid Partners, LLC; psychologist and author Florence Ladd; Bryan Stevenson, founder and executive director of the Equal Justice Initiative; and artist Kehinde Wiley.